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Burglar Held Captive By Spirit At Crime Scene

December 21st 2008 03:09


Something straight out of the gospel of stupid for you. A man was found unconcious on the floor of a home he had broken into in Malaysia. He was eventually found by the home owners 3 days later when they returned from a holiday. The Burglar alleges a spirt had held him there for that time without food or water, he was suffering severe dehydration.


The burglar told the Police that after he entered through the back door, he was blinded and felt as though he was in a cave. “Each time I wanted to flee, I felt a ’supernatural figure’ shoving me to the ground.”

I give this 8 out of 10 Heaps Goods. I think this is all easily explainable with the magic of science, allow me to elabortate. Being blinded like he was in a cave, the lights were out, douche. He felt a spirit was shoving him into the ground, I believe the spirit may have been Tequila and probably a combination of meth, hence not being able to stand and the supernatural figure visions. See kids, it's all explainable with science. Except physics, because we all know that's complete bull shit.

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